Previously on Wynonna Earp –
-Nicole Frog Haught
-Rosita found all the love in the nunnery
-Tears for Holt
-Engaygement of the century
We are back from our hibernation period and have our first recap of 2021 for you all with the mid-season premiere of Wynonna Earp 4B. Do we want more of Wynonna Earp? Yes, we do! Do we want to jump in to this episode and watch it 100 times in a row? Most definitely! So let’s dive into episode 407’Loves All Over’.
Purgatory really shines in the summer and we finally get to see it in all its glory starting with Nicole proposing on THE COUCH! Yes, that couch. It has made its way to outside a motel and the pair are all loved up and in the moment when they are interrupted and told to get a room. I mean WayHaught have never really bothered too much about which room they are in anyway, or if it is a staircase. Wynonna is taking some drunk ‘me’ time and in her daily constitutional in the woods finds that someone is chowing down on a freshly downed stag. Who is that someone? Well, it is none other than our vampire baby daddy loving Amon!
Happier times are ahead in Shortys with a small engagement celebration now that Nicole has proposed with a ring that was not on the hand of the snake from the Garden of Eden. The proper engagement party is set for the following evening and Doc and Wynonna are still in a bad place and he will not be attending the soiree in the bar, which still has a teenaged reaper in the form of Billy Clanton in the basement. That basement has seen pretty much everything now at this stage, except for you know, be a basement for storage.
Wynonna and Amon are too busy arguing over the death of the stag and Amons choice of leather apron for his excursion for Wynonna to be making her way down to Shortys. She does eventually make her way there accompanied by her one true love, Peacemaker, only to be left high and dry with Doc leaving in a hurry. Time for Wynonna making ‘plans’ for the bachelorette party aka Girls Night Out.
Girls Night Out for Wynonna though is definitely a little more male-heavy than Nicole was anticipating with a trip to a strip club for Ladies Night, or Ladies afternoon on a Sunday where it seems the non-churchgoers of Purgatory go for their weekly worship. Another bride-to-be drags Nicole off leaving Wynonna and Waverly do discuss the wedding and enjoy the show with a new act who has huge scars down his back, right where wings would be.
Rachel is still stuck at Shortys with Nedley playing the role of grandpoppy to her. I am totally here for Papa Nedley giving Rachel life advice and trying to get her to hang out with more people her age. It is even cuter than him as Dad to Nicole. He offers Rachel a job in Shortys with the proviso that she never mention Nicoles cat again. Why do you ask? Well it is the single most tragic thing that has ever happened on this show (well there are more tragic things but I like the drama OK!)
Randy Nedley put on a one-man show of Sweeney Todd when he was the barnacle monster and ate Calamity Jane.
Back at stripapalooza, Wynonna and Waverly are drinking with Demetri discussing exes and love. Demetri is a ‘Love is a lie’ proponent, but our little wave of sunshine thinks the polar opposite thankfully. Waverly and Nicole are making heart eyes at each other all while Waverly is preaching about their love and Wynonna is doing her best Alex Danvers impression and is sneaking behind the bar to get more booze. The pair place a bet on ‘Is love real? Tick for Yes or No’ before Demetri sneaks something into Waverly’s pocket and heads out of the bar with a flash of literal heart eyes. Seriously he looked like the emoji with his pupils turning into red hearts.
Anyone ask for Waverly and Nicole heading on down to the Cop Shop for a Marriage Licence? I mean I thought we were going to have to wait MONTHS for the Wayhaught wedding. Nicole, even though she has come a long way, still is not big on any PDA, especially in the bullpen. She wants to keep it all between the two of them with Waverly being too caught up in Nicole dressed in that flannel shirt to notice Homophobe of the Year Award Winner Bunny Loblaw sitting at a desk right beside her who is running everything behind the scenes in the town now that the Clantons have mostly met their demise. Nicole notices a tiny piece of heart-shaped pink glitter on her shoulder and looks over to Waverly as Bunny says the L-word. No not Love. Lesbians. Instant cut to a ‘love at first sight’ shot with a hair blow out, dreamy music and seductive eyes from Waverly and Nicole is all into that PDA all of a sudden. And right in front of Bunny Loblaws salad as well. One threat later and Waverly has a signed Marriage License in her hands while Bunny is using the town’s supply of Purell trying to not catch the gay. Waverly though is not one to let propriety and manners get in the way shakes Bunny’s hand and sends Nicole home to calm down her flaming ladybug only for Bunny to find a piece of glitter on her hand and have her own little moment falling in love with Waverly.
She doesn’t stop there though. Waverly heads off to the Glory Hole to offer a peace apple pie to Amon in the hopes of getting the demons off her back for just one day so that she can marry the love of her life without any interruptions. Amon though asks about the Clantons and what happened to take out Mam Clanton aka Waverly Earp and her magic angelic power smiting her ass for daring to turn her then-girlfriend into a frog. Waverly though has a problem with keeping her hands to herself though and taps his nose and leaves a tiny piece of glitter there. You know where this is going though right? He sees love hearts around Waverly Earp in a kiss cam moment and is instantly in love with her with Doc tending the bar behind them the entire time.
After hearing the conversation about the Clantons, Doc confronts Waverly about it, who seems to have a case of amnesia over the whole affair saying that all she did was touch her, yes it was in a creepy Harry Potter grabs the face of Quirrell way, and instantly killed her. Sure that’s all ok though because Waverly is the happiest she has ever been and wants everyone to be the same. Doc though is still hung up on the Clantons and wants to make sure that Cleo is ok as well.
Nicole has been back in the barn looking through Waverly’s old wedding scrapbooks wanting to give Waverly everything she ever wanted, but Waverly knows something is up. Possession is not out of the realms of possibility for them and she instantly suspects it, but no dice. They are interrupted from creating their wedding hashtag (I see you #WayHaught!) by an incessant car honk with one Bunny Loblaw, leader of the towns Straight Parade, coming by to tell Waverly that she is a baby gay and wants to be with her complete with fake roses and all to go and watch one of the gayest non-gay canon movies ever, Bend it like Beckham. (I don’t make the rules. That movie is gay AF! It is a wonder we were allowed to watch it in R.E. in a Catholic High School on repeat every week).
Enter Wynonna Earp and her grand entrances, passed out drunk in the back of her truck by kicking down the bed and sitting up with the stripper chef hat on after hearing the whole love confession booth. Waverly asks why she is suddenly everybody’s thing but news flash, you have anyways been everybody’s thing – all bets aside.
Time to wake up and smell the coffee for Wynonna but Waverly is not here for her drunken jokes over Bunny all of a sudden being so into Waverly that it cured her homophobia. It could only be one thing though right? Demon, demon, demon. Right? Waverly thinks not.
Doc is on the trail of the magistrate at Magpie Ranch when he discovers the rotting and decomposing corpse of Mam Clanton sitting in a rocking chair outside in the sun surrounded by flies. I love gross and gore as much as the next person and that was a little extra, even for me. Who is hiding behind the truck to her side though, none other than Cleo Clanton looking as perfect as ever with her tear-stained face asking Doc to kill her. Doc though finds a tiny piece of glitter on his leather jacket and sees Cleo in all her beauty with her smoulder spotlight and manages to sweet-talk her out of her hiding place with his silver tongue.
To The Glory Hole it is with all of its bisexual lightning goodness for Wynonna to find a piece of glitter on her jacket and yup, you guessed it, fall for Amon who id still decidedly in love with Waverly. Waverly is hot on the trail though of the sexed and loved up people around her and confronts Demitri at his motel room who it turns out is actually Cupid and passed on his powers to Waverly who has been inadvertently leaving a trail of glitter that goes all over town with the person receiving the glitter falling instantly in love with the first person they see after they notice the glitter.
Wynonna is ALL in for Amon, but he can’t get away quick enough. Sure he is normally Hot for Doc, but Waverly’s Peace Pie left much more of an impression on him than she initially realised. Amons confession of love only pushes Wynonna over the edge.
Back in the barn, Waverly explains that she can only get rid of the glitter vial responsibly. Responsibly meaning ‘leaving it behind at the Homestead’, but actually means that Wynonna, in her strappy bodysuit which killed us all, grabs it from Waverly’s bag and slides it into her bra, because all bras double as a handbag when required.
The enGAYgement party is in full swing and looks like something out of Janelle Monae’s ‘Pynk’ video with everyone who was glittered instantly trying to get Waverly’s attention and Nicole and Bunny playing a game of ‘Who wore it best’. (Me. The answer is me. Not really just I wear that exact same outfit whenever I want to dress up a little). Amon has balloons and Bunny has two new phones with the same number, you know, in case someone calls her about setting up her new account to Gays R Us. Bunny has switched her ire from homophobia to anyone who is showing shoulders, which right now is Wynonna. Wynonna though hits out with one of the best jokes in maybe the entire show saying to get Bunny so shitfaced she thinks she’s Jann Arden. I mean I am still reeling from that joke hours later because it is simply amazing! In her wake, Wynonna leaves a piece of glitter on Nedley’s hand causing a little love moment between him and Bunny.
Anyone ask for Wynonna climbing Amon like a jungle gym to try and ride him like a mechanical bull? Amon certainly didn’t and everyone is nopes it out of there only for Bunny Loblaw -aka the actual Jann Arden-to take to the stage and sing ‘Insensitive’ and dedicate it to Waverly.
Back at Magpie Ranch, Cleo and Doc are having a beautiful sunset talk on the porch normally only reserved for Doc and Wynonna. Cleo’s self-worth is the trash can and on fire beside the porch, but Doc in his old-timey manner is able to show her that she is a survivor and its time to write her own story away from what Mam Clanton wanted.
Bunny’s dedication to Waverly is too much for Nicole and she rushes to the stage to sing the song Waverly sang for her in the Christmas episode only to be followed by everyone else who was glittered, leaving Rachel free to grab Nedley’s keys to the basement and Waverly to run away to the bathroom to escape to call Doc for help. Still at the ranch, Doc has turned Cleo’s mood around who reveals to him that the deal Nicole made with Mam to get Waverly out of the Garden of Eden was for Doc himself!
Rachel sneaks down to the basement to see Billy for the first time in a month to find only chains, but without being marked, she can’t see Billy in his Reaper form and he moves and groans in the way only a reaper can do while everyone in the bar above fights over Waverly. Doc has arrived to save the day, as has Demetri, but Wynonna needs Amon to love her back in her glittered state and opens the vial to give him a strong dose but the table she is on is knocked by Nicole causing a glitter bomb of epic proportions to glitter everyone! Well except Waverly, Demetri and Rachel in a shot reminiscent of Wynonna riding the bull in Season 3. Well, it stops the fight and makes Amon fall in love with her, but it makes everyone else fall in love with her too! All the glitter makes me miss conventions so much! I mean I was still finding glitter three months later so I can only imagine what that amount of glitter would do.
Everyone starts slow dancing with each other with Nicole making the moves on Wynonna, Wynaught shippers RISE! Wynonna moves on to eventually dance with Doc showing us that true love does exist and that they are both still super in love with each other. Waverly, ever the investigator, finally gets to the bottom of why Demitri doesn’t believe in love and that reason is none other than Bambi killer Amon. Who pegged Amon for a dick? Well turns out changing the locks on your boyfriend is the latest version of breaking up via a text.
Waverly uses her angelic ways and manages to show Demitri that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all because that shows that the love was real and it does exist, or something a little less wordy than that, and he agrees to take back his Cupid sparkles again but only if Waverly helps him shoot spitwads at everyone’s butts to end the love spell caused by the glitter.
Rachel finally gets to speak with Billy after her whole camping out at the ranch thing a month ago to talk to him for him to explain he wants to go home. Reaper problem solved! Or at least postponed to another day anyway.
Spitwad spat, the spell on Wynonna and Doc breaks with Wynonna wanting Doc to stay in her arms as the slow dance, but Doc pulls her arms away and leaves the bar while the spell breaks on everyone else and Nicole instantly coming in for a hug and to finalise their plan for their wedding. Demitri, now in his delivery driver job rather than in assless chaps for being a stripper, explains he chose Waverly because he has never seen anyone more in love than Waverly is with Nicole. Be still my little shipper heart!
Maybe Doc shouldn’t have given Cleo a little morale boost because now it’s time to dispose of Mams body. Well, it was getting a little ripe sitting in that chair in the sun. But instead of burying it, she feeds it to the other reapers, the only end fitting for someone hoping to become a reaper, all while soliloquising about how she is going to get them all back, just like Mam wanted.
Party now over, it’s time for Bunny to leave and go home, but not before she completes her redemption arc. While she may not be on the lead float in the Purgatory Pride Parade any time soon, she has turned a corner and thinks that their love is ‘inspiring’. I mean we all love this for Bunny. I’m sure she loves it more with Nedley is driving her home and leaves with the iconic line of ‘Have a nice evening lesbians!’
Wynonna is still hung up on Amon. That leather apron and gloves combo must have really done something for her because she takes off Peacemaker and asks Amon to show her how much of a cowboy matador he really is. I knew that bisexual lighting would come in handy in the Glory Hole one day!
Billy has finally made his way home, just after Cleo finished disposing of Mam Clanton, and in time for Cleo to make her plans for how to finish what Mam started.
What an episode to come back on! Welcome back Earpers! Sure we are fighting for our show yet again and it is hard to imagine why this show has not been picked up again when it comes back from Covid Quarantine with an episode like this, but I am here for it no matter how many more episodes we get. I very much look forward to staying up till 4 am on a Saturday back in our original time slot and I hope that we can all enjoy this show for many more seasons. Catch you all next week for the Halloween episode which looks creepy as hell!
-Written by Christine