Previously on Wynonna Earp:
-Cabin in the not-sexy fog
-JOLENE!
-Jeremy and Doc imprisoned in BBD
-Dark Waverly
The time is almost here. This is our penultimate recap (hopefully it is just the last one of this season and not the whole series) and we’ve done all we can today to procrastinate. Let’s get to it.
We open this week after the stress-filled episode last week where we left off. Mercedes has been shot my General Moustache and instead of getting her the medical attention she needs, they decide that the absolute best thing to do is to put a woman bleeding from a GSW to the abdomen in the same cage as a Vampire who has been known to have blood lust issues in the past. Good call there Moustache. Now her very expensive dress is ruined, probably her jacket too after you literally dragged her across the floor, and Jeremy and the Freddy the Werewolf are left to prevent Doc from making a huge mistake that he will regret for the rest of his immortal life. Moustache and his goonies are watching on like it’s a new episode of Big Brother while this all goes on. I mean come on. Get your reality TV elsewhere! If you wanted to watch a car wreck, I hear the last season of KUWTK is happening. Bet Wynonna is happy she took Cleo out of BBD now to help.
Speaking of Wynonna, Dark Angel Waverly has appeared in front of her looking like something out of Goths R Us. I’m sure I saw so many people in my favourite nightclub looking like this, like constantly. Maybe minus the huge ass wings, but the makeup, the shorts, the pale makeup and septum piercing are hitting the coffin nail right on the head with this look. Talking about fail-safes and Jolene being Waverly’s other half, this version of Waverly is not here to play nice with her sister. With Enya music and Lord of the Rings references at the ready, (which really with Enya appearing on the soundtrack for Fellowship means they are kinda both LOTR references really) Wynonna is ready to fight to get her sister back from the dark side, but Waverly has other plans, and with what I like to call ‘The White Hand of Sauron’ placement, Waverly blinds Wynonna and heads off to fulfil her dark sides plan.
Oh wow. All this before the opening credits. How will we ever survive! I mean I’m not entirely sure that I did and I may be writing this from the grave, but oh boy we are in for a real ride here Earpers!
Cleo and Rachel still in the woods, seeing as no one has informed them yet of what is happening. If baiting was an Olympic Sport then, well Cleo would get into the finals for sure as she baits and switches Rachel with Talking about Doc and Jeremy in a cage at BBD (which she doesn’t react too much to) but then she tells Rachel that it is, in fact, Billy the Reaper who was sent in with Wynonna to get Waverly. Fool Rachel once, shame on you as when Cleo calls out Wynonna, Rachel instantly places the gun squarely on Cleo’s head, ready to fight for her family. Before she can do any actual fighting, Jolene’s hair catches on fire and distracts them. But Cleo is after something else. She wants her brother back, and she will do anything to make that happen.
Mercedes isn’t looking too hot (well she does because it’s Dani Fucking Kind) bleeding out on the concrete floor with no medical attention. With the blood streaming from her mouth and stomach, and blood covering the floor, Doc really isn’t handling it all too well. He is handling it better than a house full of Cullens, which is great news for us, but there is a lot of fresh blood around. Even the mention of the word ‘blood’ isn’t helping anyone, especially not Doc. Freddy steps up though and becomes Mercedes’ protector while Jeremy tries to stop the bleeding with nothing but Mercedes’ jacket. Great job Moustache. Let an innocent woman bleed out on your watch all because you are on a power trip. I’m sure that’ll look GREAT on your resume!
Rachel wants her almost not-boyfriend back as much as Cleo does and finds herself roped into a Clanton ritual to make her and Billy blood brothers? Blood brothers with a stone? I don’t know but there is a lot of blood in this episode. They are left there trying to free Billy from being a Reaper while he chases after Wynonna, who is still blind and stumbling around in the woods with nothing but her hearing and touch. Doing the blood ritual has meant that Rachel had to put down the gun, giving Cleo the perfect opportunity to grab it while Rachel is distracted.
The woods in Purgatory are not safe at the best of times but blinded and with a Reaper after you makes them doubly so. Branches snapping all around her, Wynonna has nowhere to go while Billy sneaks up on her. Blinded with nothing but her hearing, Wynonna is left staring down a reaper with no help.
Trying to get away and still blinded, Wynonna falls over a tree stump and is left in the hands of Billy, but he is no longer Billy the Reaper. He is regular Billy Clanton who goes dumpster diving with Rachel for deals, and a deal he did find. Back being a human, he found Peacemaker on his travels in the woods and has safely returned it to Wynonna. In her panic, Billy leads her out of the woods.
Freddy has exhausted himself fighting off Doc, who has also exhausted himself in trying to hold back. Jeremy and Doc are left to hug it out, with Doc on the brink of an emotional breakdown. Jeremy though is the absolute best at pop talks and tells him, yes you have fucked up, but you aren’t a fuck up and you have been making changes for the better. Oh yeah, and he calls Doc his brother. Cue the tears right here. I’m sure if this was in good ol’ regular print there would be ink smudges right here. Jeremy offers himself up in place of Mercedes, but all Doc does is embrace him in a hug. With his wits about him, Doc is ready to formulate a plan to get them out, but the bars are too strong for one cowboy vampire alone. And Freddy is useless against iron. Enter Mercedes Gardner with the answer.
To stop her from dying, and to give them a chance to get out alive, Mercedes consents to Doc turning her. Well, it is her idea after all. And no one can argue that Mercedes was not born to be a vampire. Now just give me all the vampire Mercedes/Kate fanfic and I’ll be a happy woman.
Running through the woods, Nicole is on her own mission to try and find Wynonna and Waverly, but all she picks up on her radio is interference from BBD with orders to Maldito Purgatory. Nicole has no option but to save her townspeople. She is the best Sheriff Purgatory has ever known after all, except Randy Nedley of course.
Newly vamped up, Mercedes is ready to kick some ass, and by ass I mean eating anyone she wants and destroying the cage bars to free all the prisoners. She is doing more eating than freeing in a chic BBD blazer but still leads the charge with all of the ‘prisoners’ behind her.
Leading Wynonna through the woods is no longer needed once Wynonna’s sight comes back, but the only thing to see is Rachels blood from her de-reaperising ritual. Billy’s weird tooth is there as well leading them to the only conclusion they can reach, that Rachel and Cleo saved him to save Wynonna. Wynonna needs to find Waverly, but Rachel is back at the ranch with Cleo who isn’t as put together as she shows. And Rachel is a human with no angel blood or magic gun to save her, except if Wynonna goes to save her. If Wynonna goes to save the youngest member of her family. Billy can’t go save her though or all the blood loss was for nothing and he’ll be the newest member of reaper city again, so they split up. Billy to deal with his weird-ass tooth and Wynonna to save Smalldez.
Dark Angel Mode is still activated with Waverly stealing a dead BBD guards cigarettes and smoking them while looking at the destruction of the BBD offices, which is now up in flames with people fighting and laying dead or unconscious. Looks like they need a hero.
The march of the prisoners reaches a dead end with a locked fault door and gas being pumped in. The good news is that Nicole Haught arrived just in the nick of time and forces General Moustache to open the door at gunpoint. He tries to make the case that these are dangerous beings, but Freddy is Nicole’s florist and is a bit of a pushover. These prisoners may not all be human, but they are Nicole’s people and her duty to protect them from the likes of Moustache. Knocking him out, Nicole leads them to safety outside to try and find a way out of the fog. But there is no more fog. Waverly absorbed it back into the garden in the last episode. So they are safe! Well, maybe not so safe with Doc hearing creepy whispering in his head. Knowing he has to get ready for something, he heads back inside to raid the armoury and get his guns back while Nicole and Jeremy lead everyone away from the gassy building.
Magpie Ranch is slightly more occupied than Wynonna remembers, and more pungent than she remembers, with a pit full of Reapers right in front of her when entering with Bulshar type hands rising and trying to grab at something to get out. Cleo has Rachel tied to a chair while she monologues but in comes Wynonna to save Rachel and to save the day. Cleo’s brain is twisted in all the right wrong ways. Is this what happens to all Clantons, or just to the Clanton women, or just to the heirs? Time for Mam’s plan to finally come together, overseen by Reaper Holt (who I am again so sad for because he never got his dinner date!) With a Clanton brand in hand, Cleo is ready to give it all up to make someone else the heir. For their greatest enemy to be the heir.
Doc, leaving the armoury all prepped up, is overcome again with the creepy whispering that only he can hear. Heading outside he finds Waverly in all her gothic goodness. He tries to get her to leave, but she wants her book, the one that she took from the garden with her name on it. Before he can fight for Waverly, a ‘C’ brand appears on his hand in light blue before disappearing, and with Doc following shortly after. I guess that’s what Mam wanted Doc for. She wanted him to be the Clanton heir and to take out Wynonna for her. What greater way to bring down her enemies than to pit them against each other. After disappearing, Doc reappears behind Wynonna at Magpie Ranch declaring himself to be the Clanton heir.
Guess it’s time for the Kleenex warning.
It’s the new Clanton Heir against the Earp Heir with Doc pushing Wynonna into the middle of the kill box ready for a pay per view showdown and everyone except for Cleo is tuning in to watch who has an 8 pm showing of ‘Courage the Cowardly Dog- The Movie’ at a cinema near you. Heading out in a red convertible that would make Charlene jealous, Cleo nope’s it out of there, probably never to be seen again in the Ghost River Triangle. That leaves us with the main event. The real tearjerker fight. Earp vs Holliday, showdown at the Magpie Ranch, O.K. Corrall do-over.
Would the real Doc Holliday please stand up because all this Doc has on his mind is vengeance for the Clantons. Their history courses through him overpowering the real Doc and forcing him to face off against an unarmed Wynonna. That’s no problem really because Rachel has been caught by Holt (gee that guy has really had it in for her ehh?) and she throws Peacemaker into the thunder dome to give Wynonna a chance. Wynonna refuses to pick it up, but Doc turns his gun on Rachel and forces Wynonna to fight him in a rematch. What is the stake? Well, it’s one Rachel Valdez.
I think it is at this point my heart rate reached over 110bpm according to my watch anyway. And it is no wonder that it did. The tension can be cut with a freaking chainsaw now. Make sure you grab your doughnuts and comfort blankets. You’re gonna need them.
Nicole is leading a small battalion of Purgatorians out of BBD and into the back of an unmarked BBD supply truck, but Jeremy gets his magic crotch feeling. Nicole can’t go any further with them. It is up to Jeremy to get them to safety. Nicole, on the other hand, is needed at the stairs to the garden.
Randy has been left alone in Shortys with the worlds saddest cocktail; banana liqueur, water and a little umbrella. Billy interrupts his wallowing and saves him from the drink by pulling out his root tooth, which is a completely unsanitary thing to do in a bar. Not that I think Purgatory really cares too much right now for health and safety standards but I’m sure that would get them a write-up. With Rachel and Wynonna’s lives on the line, Billy enlists Nedley (Wolf pelt and book in tow) to help make him the Clanton heir.
Wynonna picks up Peacemaker and they turn their backs and recite the Ten Duel Commandments. On the count of one Doc turns around, pistol drawn, but Wynonna still has her back to him, knowing the one thing Doc Holliday will never do is shoot someone in the back. He draws his pistol again, but not before Wynonna can get a shot off to hit a sign and have the bullet go right through Holts’s head, an almost replica of the shot Wynonna pulled off in the very first episode to save Waverly from Stupid Carl and Co. when they infiltrated the Homestead for a Welcome Home party for Wynonna. Doc shoots, but the gun blows up on him after loading it with the wrong bullets. Now we know what Doc was preparing for before he left BBD. He was making sure that no matter what happened, Wynonna would live and would survive the shoot out, but she has other things to worry about. The Reapers are coming.
Billy and Nedley are incanting in Shortys with the blue ‘C’ brand appearing on Billy’s hand much in the same way it did with Wynonna. He manages to get the Reapers to stand down, but Doc is still on the ground with Wynonna above him asking her to kill him. He wants a way out. His life, his regrets, his vengeance, have changed him completely. He cannot live as he is anymore, and he begs Wynonna to give him a way out. Through their, and my, tears, they both try and convince each other that their side is right, but Wynonna always finds another way. One which appears before them in the form of Waverly Earp with her fallen angel wings surrounding her.
I don’t think I’ve ever been as happy as I am to have ad breaks as I have been in this episode because I really did need time to calm down. I couldn’t even eat my obligatory Earp Night doughnuts I was that stressed out!
Dark Waverly stands tall in front of Wynonna and the fallen Doc Holliday talking about mistakes and regrets. Wynonna calls in the one card that she can. She is the champion, Waverly’s champion, and if Wynonna has to lose Waverly, then the least she can do is make sure she doesn’t lose the love of her life too on the same day. All Waverly wants is the book, which Wynonna is all too happy to hand over. Anything, as long as she gets Doc back. Waverly places her hands on each side of his face and casts Revivify and Doc is once more alive. But something is off. Wynonna, breaking her heart over losing her sister, hands over the book, and falls into Doc’s waiting arms in her heartbreak while Waverly walks off. Sure she gave her some words of ‘comfort’ in telling her that everything has happened this way because Waverly loved Wynonna.
She has one more parting gift on her way out for Holt and the other Clanton reapers. She turns them all into magpies before heading to the stairs. She gets a few steps up before she is stopped by Nicole. Nicole can’t get up the stairs, but she refuses to let Waverly go back to the garden without her. Humans can’t get into the garden, we saw that last time, at least not via the stairs anyway. Nicole appeals to Waverly with Wynonna, but Waverly released her from her duty as Champion. Trying to logic her way out, Nicole offers herself as guardian of all in the Ghost River Triangle. Good thing is that Waverly is a rule-breaker and brought Doc back, and she even took the book out of the garden when it shouldn’t have been taken out. Nicole asks her to read it to show Waverly that she is part of her story. Whatever it says, it convinces Waverly, and Nicole accepts the price that she must pay to keep her Waverly. The price? She can never leave the Ghost River Triangle in exchange for being The Shield.
Throwing the book back into the garden, our Waverly reappears and rushes to Nicole who is flung in the air after her vow. True loves kiss is what brings Nicole back, but she has a pain in her neck. A cut on the back of her neck in the shape of angel wings with a sword running through the centre with a triangle connecting all three in a better version of the Deathly Hallows.
Jeremy and Freddy are back at BBD after getting the townspeople to safety, only to be cut off by Moustache who has now woken up after Nicole knocked him out with the butt end of her service weapon. He wants Jeremy to call BBD, but BBD call Jeremy instead asking about what is happening there and if Moustache is alive, but Jeremy wipes him out with a few simple words to Freddy.
Reconvening at Shortys, the Earp/Holliday/Haught/Chetri family regroup with blankets and some flirting for Doc and Wynonna who have overcome their differences. Wynonna has interrupted Wayhaught more times than I can count, so it is about time Nicole got some payback of her own. She wants to discuss the elephant in the room, but everyone chimes in with what they think it is before she can get another word out. Dark angel Waverly is gone, but that’s not it. Jeremy chimes in with BBD being gone from the triangle for good, but that’s not it either. One more shot with Doc seeing his reflection for the first time in months, meaning that he is no longer a vampire per his own wishes. But that’s the third wrong answer so they are all out. All Nicole wants to talk about is her and Waverly’s wedding.
I don’t even know where to begin with this episode. It has my entire heart for all of the reasons. It was an emotional rollercoaster from start to finish. I had all the stress and I’m sure that if I had a second to breathe I would have stress eaten my way through a bag of pretzels again and nearly died on one like I did a few weeks ago with another show.
Now that we are coming to an end of these (at least on SyFy and hopefully not forever) I can’t stop reflecting on what this show means to me. This show came to me at a time when I needed it most. I was almost a full year into living in Canada after moving to a whole new continent by myself and was trying to find my own place to live. I started it on a Friday night in April and had finished it in its entirety by the Saturday afternoon after season one went on Netflix. Ever since that point, Wynonna Earp has been there for me. Through cosplaying and going to conventions, to meeting my fam at meetups, to going to each other’s houses to watch episodes as they aired live in group watches, to waking up at an ungodly hour to live tweet from the UK after I was forced to move back, this show has been there for me. It has been there for me in the way of my friends. It has given me something to look forward to each year with new episodes and with conventions to go to. It has been there for me when I have felt so alone. Wynonna Earp has been a friend, and I am not ready to say goodbye to her or to every single other character in the show.
If this truly is the end next week, then it has been a ride of a lifetime. We have fought so hard for this show year in year out and have achieved so much in terms of bringing this show back from the brink. So much in terms of looking out for one another and making connections. So much in terms of making this world a better and kinder place to live in. Earpers, it has been an honour. Let’s go out with a bang, shall we?
-Written by Christine
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